So on 7th February 2012 9:05pm, my dearest ah yi left us :'(
Didn't know that on the 4th, the family gathering was the last,
with her. She was admitted into the hospital on the 6th and in
the middle of the night, transferred into ICU and went into a
coma. Before she went into a coma, she actually even told my
da yi that she has "survived through cny". Imagine how much
she has went through in holding back the pain so that we
would not be worried for her, so that she can actually spend
the new year with us. ♥
That night, she waited for almost everyone to reach before
she actually leave us. It really breaks all our heart to see her
in that state. Her face was swollen we couldn't recognize her.
She is the youngest(39) in the family and all my ah yi and ah
gu dotes on her the MOST. I really mean the most and their
bias is super obvious. All my cousins and I love her the most
too :( That night, everyone cried so hard. We all all know deep
down, that leaving this world would means that she would be
relieved from all the pain, we should feel happy for her but rly,
we can't bear to see her leave.
EXAM WEEK that week too. Survived with only 8 hours of
sleep that week from Tues to Sat.. Hate the fact that I had got
exams if not I would had stayed at the funeral all night. Will
not do well for my last 2 papers.. Studied at 12 midnight when
the paper is at 10am!! But I never regret for going to the
funeral and not staying at home to study.
Found my ah yi's diary in her phone's Note. Yes, all break
into tears again. She wrote on how she feel every time after
she do her chemotherapy, how she is 一天过一天 because
she don't know when she is leaving, how she won't bear to
leave us, how she encourage herself to jiayous on fighting
against the "naughty"(she claims) cancer cells. Lastly, a msg
to us that one day when she leave, she wants us to move on
and that wherever she is, she will miss us and all.
My ah yi was really very strong :') When she first know she
had breast cancer, she was so brave to do the operation and
undergo all the chemotherapy. 最爱美的她,all her 头发 will drop
also 勇敢地面对了. She waited till the doctor say there is no
more cancer cells found and let her hair grow all over again.
But never to what we would expect, after two years, the
naughty cells is back again. This time round, in her bone &
slowly, all over the body. Really, she is strong to be positive,
fighting against the cancer cells, undergoing chemotherapy
again. *salute* My favourite, dearest, closest to me ah yi,
you are beautiful, with or without your hair. I hope you are
living in somewhere beautiful now, relieved from all the pain
cancer has brought to you.
I love you and definitely,
will always remember you and miss you A LOT. ♥And to everyone, cherish the time you can have with your
loved ones because when they leave, there were only be
memories left. P.s: teared throughout the entire post here.
